Good news, I think I just may become friends again with my old best friend who I haven’t even spoken to for months.
Bad news, that guy likes the girl I use to be cool with&live by and it’s the girl we argued about that asked him out on a dare by her friend and he mentioned me LASTLY for the reason he said no to her.
Good news, I don’t think she’ll like him.
Bad news, I don’t know that for sure.
I know I can’t delete my memories with him, but I sure can try by deleting all the stuff we have of each other.
It’s really hard but I’m trying. I hate him so much, this is making cry. But I have to stay strong. And it’s not even because I think there’s no one else on this 7 BILLION people planet that I won’t find someone else, it’s because he lied to me. It’s because he wasted my precious time on this Earth. It’s because I really did like him. I would say love him but I don’t know what love is. But as far as I could tell what love was, that was it to me. But I know it wasn’t. It was just stupid puppy love. But even though it was, it still hurts. :(
It’s because he said “We have something special.” Which I knew was bull crap, but I’m just another fool for love. And for that, I hate myself. I hate him. I hate love. But I just gotta get over it. My fault. Myself to blame. I just wish it didn’t hurt so bad. I wish he hurt like me. And he says he “feels bad.” And THAT pisses me off the most. There’s so much he lied about. I would write it all but it’s too many messages and lies. I just want everyone to hate him. But I know that’s stupid. I’m stupid. I hate everything. And he said when it ended, “We both knew this day would come.” When HE’S THE ONE WHO SAID, “I’ll always have a place in my heart for you.” BULL CRAP! That pisses me off the most. And he told me JUST the day before, he loved me. I hate him. He makes ME feel stupid. I THOUGHT HE WAS TOO IMMATURE TO HURT ME. But I was sooooooooooo WRONG!
Basically, I’m just angry, hurt, emotional, and crying because it was all lies and a waste of time. And because HE liked ME first. Otherwise, I would NEVER HAVE LIKED HIM! Gah I just hate him so much, God please help me.
I’m just one of those dumb kids that try to be funny because I feel like I have to for people to like me.
And when people offend me, I say something stupid that might be the wrong thing to say and then I act like I don’t care, and then I go home and cry because what a fool I am.
I just really want to be noticed.. like somebody actually cares for me.
I want people to love me like they do you.
Instead, of people leaving me out of things, and making me feel like a dork. And it hurts too, when people say mean comments after you do something half the class likes. It makes me feel foolish.
I don’t say it to be an idiot.
I do it because I want attention.
Which sounds really stupid, but that’s just my feelings.